.please do not eat.

I went surfing this morning and brought my board to work [ie. Manoa Pool] and left it in the closet where one of my beloved coworkers attached this leftover sign [from C. Toe's food] to it. I giggled.

.the only tattoos I get are from the reef.

"So you kicked the reef?"
"No, the reef kicked me."

The only tattoos I get are from the reef.

I saw the quote in a magazine once. Personally it rings quite true, mainly because of my deathly fear of needles and of my mom biting me if and when she ever saw me with anything but a temporary tattoo [and even those I'm only allowed to wear on the back of my hand like a five-year-old].

So sad that reef injuries leave a temporary [and not necessarily attractive] scar. I just hope that this time the coral doesn't decide to make home and grow ... I enjoy my feet coral-free.

With the exception of this little boo-boo today was a glorious day. Glenn[iffer] didn't try to bite me or eat any babies. Also, my injury was minor. Some of the guys today [and Monday] were talking about a man who ran over a kid on Sunday and split his head open. Not a story I plan on sharing with my parents any time soon.

Last week I did something kind of silly [and stupid]. Boredom never leads to any good. Of course nothing truly drastic results [thank the goodness] but if it had ... well me not being able to surf at Concessions ever again would probably be the least of my worries.

Lifeguard Mari said that I should never allow a boy to dictate where I surf but I've run away for a lot less. But then again I rarely if ever care about/love something as much as I love my little surf spot.

For the moment there is a truce.

Whilst typing this article my grandma leaned over my shoulder and asked,
"No more boyfriend?"
"No Grandma."
"Good girl."

ARGH.

.suckies.

After dinner the kiddies wanted to go fishing in the stream. So net and bucket in tow we crossed the street and went frolicking about in Nuuanu stream [the little one, not the larger one].

When I was in elementary school I remember spending my summer days in the backyards of the neighbors across the street fishing in the stream. We caught everything from opai [freshwater shrimp] to crayfish, guppies, swordtails, tadpoles, etc. Of course even then, there would be times when the stream would go dead because someone's lawn man [or even owner] would grow lazy and dump fuel or insect poison into the water upstream. All that we would find would catch was the odd guppy and we'd see dead crayfish shells floating in the eddies.

Today there were a number of fish, but now, mainly suckers. Despite the commercials on tv idiots still continue to dump there aquarium pets into the stream where they proceed to multiply by the minute. We were only scoop-netting a fifty foot stretch of river and caught more than thirty suckers.



They are so disgusting. Ick.

With Daddy's permission we dumped all the little suckies underneath a bush in our front yard. Good fertilizer!

I know the Hawaiian Humane Society offers a program where you can bring in your unwanted aquarium fish. I don't remember where they keep them [or even if they keep them anymore] but either way I'm sure it's a better alternative than releasing them amongst all the poor guppies and opais!

.save our kakaako.

After this mornings surf session I headed over to Kakaako with Mari's friends to attend the Save Our Kakaako rally.

It was a very well organized event, complete with t-shirts [I love a good t-shirt, particularly in Roosevelt colors], stickers, signs, live music, cute puppies, young children waving signs, etc. The rally started in the parking lot of Kakaako Waterfront Park at 10 am. After a short pep talk, we walked down to Ala Moana Blvd to wave signs for 2-ish hours. Personally, I have never waved signs before, it is a hot, hot, tiring job.
People who honk their horn are awesome. I think there is a direct corrolation - the uglier the car the more likely the driver is to honk. Ugly car = a cool car.

The group, Save Our Kakaako opposes A & B's planned development of several condo units in the Kakaako area. The group is against the sale of public land for the gains of private companies. They would like the state to gain the input of the community to determine Kakaako's future.

Kakaako is one of the few large green spaces remaining in central Oahu.

.small, small world.

Albeit a bit late [for me] I made it out. It was glassy [yay] and the tide was low[boo] and there were oogles of people [boo] and no waves [yuck] but there was a large pod of spinner dolphins that were traipsing about very near to us [yay]. I like dolphins.

Also, one of my greater fears were realized today when by a random turn of events it was discovered that some of the guys that I surf with are high school/intermediate school chums with Daddy. Yikes bikes. They were asking me where I lived and then named the street that I live on. Then they said that they knew a few people on that street and I asked who. They named Dad. Urghwlksdfj. Apparently they all grew up together and they now think that if Daddy found out I surfed with them that he wouldn't let me surf anymore. Not so. I told Dad and he didn't care. Just more people to watch out for me to make sure I don't die. Yay!

My island is too durn tiny.

.Puffy.

The potentially big waves and crowds scared me off today. Instead I'm consoling myself with the reminder that I [at least] pulled a double session on Wednesday, which turned out to be the longest day of the year! Days are already getting shorter. Yuck. This morning I was supposed to get up early in order to return Puffy to his motherland [aka. the Pacific Ocean].



[This is Puffy in the right corner. My stupid camera wouldn't focus.]
When the Opihi caught Puffy in his hands Wednesday afternoon the plan was to give him to Mariko but she said that one fish can kill five and we wouldn't want that now would we? So Puffy has been homeless [and living in a glass in my room where I occasionally shake the jar to oxygenate and add tiny bits of tap h2o]. Didn't think that he was going to make it through the night [since I've had brackish pufferfish before and they were quite sensitive] but lo and behold Puffy is a fighter! I was going to return him this morning [since I couldn't yesterday] when I went to surf but I didn't go and now I've become quite attached to the little fellow. Does someone want to adopt him? He is tiny [and loveable, as all the animals I bring home often are]!



[He is the itty bitty speck beneath the "U" in my Nalgene bottle. Isn't he precious?]
I did some research thinking that maybe there was a chance I could keep him. But there isn't. Doh. He eats meat and what not and needs to live in a 10 gallon tank! He is such a needy little fish!
Also, Puffy isn't too attractive when he grows up. Have you ever seen those gigantous ten lb. puffies swimming about? Yes. I think one of them may have been Mom ...
Let me know if anyone wants a little Puffy in their life [or Mari, if you change your mind after seeing the adorableness that he is, he can be Nemo and lead all your other fishies to freedom!].

.work is for people who don't surf.

Today I: Woke up at 6 am. surfed, went to work, went back to the beach to surf with Opihi, Dad and friend, went home and took a nap, went to Brew Moon and D&B's. I'm pooped. On my midnight drive home [much past my bedtime] the truck in front of me had a bumper sticker that read,

"Work is for people that don't surf."

Which is so true. Because if I had a "real" job I wouldn't be able to surf [as much]. I don't know what people who live on this island do if they don't surf. Do drugs? Make babies? Life must be so dull.

Found this article in the LA Times. I've never heard of Bobby Martinez before but that just goes to show you how out of current surfing events I am [since apparently he's second only to Kelly Slater in WCT standings].

It's a nice article about overcoming obstacles and staying away from gangs and drugs and what not, though since most people typically overcome some sort of obstacle in their quest towards some lifetime dream it didn't make my heart bleed [except for the part where he saw his cousin have her neck slit open on the sidewalk, that is kind of heartwrenching]. I hope he wins the WCT. Kelly has enough titles.

This afternoon I learned Phillipine martial arts from my haole neighbor. =) He's teaching his own little girls so he started having weekly classes for their friends so every Monday there are a flock of little girls in their front yard brandishing sticks and counting in Spanish. He said I'm the fastest learner he's had in 25 years of teaching [and I asked if this was only in comparison to the five year olds and he said no]. Yay hooray. I've been promoted to swiss-army-knife carrying status. Don't mess.

I was too lazy to wake up this morning and surf because of the 4.5 hours of slumber I had on Saturday night and because last night I couldn't fall asleep what with all the wind rustling my blinds and stupid tower fan gusting away with it's imitation night wind sounds. And I had to be at work by 9:15. Excuses, excuses. In the back of my mind I tell myself that I don't need to surf as much anymore because I have a seemingly endless number of surfing days spanning before me now that I have no return flight to the continental U.S. booked for me to be on.

But the truth of the matter is that in the back of my mind I'm worried that I'm surfing for all the wrong reasons. Is that possible? Who knows.

I hope the surf was small and blown out and that it smelled funny.

.daddy's day.

Happy Father's Day to all Daddy's out there.

Surfed at 6 am. today so that I could make it home for 9 am. Father's Day brunch. All the Daddy's were out getting their surf in before going home to spend the day with their families. It was small-ish but the guys were having one. Kawaii so.

I really, really wanted to get my daddy a puppy for Father's Day but feared for my head if I did [so I got him Bluetooth instead].

Black lab puppy! Argh. So cute. And I would teach it to swim/surf with me [on small days of course]. I'd also train it to dive for me if I was drowning. How cool would I be?

.671.

I actually paddled out with someone [and had actually planned to meet with them and surf with them] for the first time since my return home. Due to my newfound antisocial behavior, this is semi-noteworthy. It also reminded me why I don't like to surf with people ... and why I do [but more so, why I don't]. Opihi's new nickname is "number 671" as a result of his being the 671st reason as to why I don't like to surf with other people [they arrive late and make me wait around on the beach for them].

It is nice though, to have someone beside me, whipping me into shape. When Opihi is around I actually have to paddle and then catch the wave, because if I return to my previous spot beside him, wave-less, there will typically be some sort of hell to pay. He is the most peer-pressuring surf freind that I have, and I swear that one day, as a result I will either die or suffer seriously bodily harm. These days [and as a result of my old age] I've been content with just sitting around and paddling half-heartedly for waves [and catching only 3-ish a session] but now if a wave is coming towards me it's either paddle or die trying. Which is good in it's own "I-guess-I-have-nothing-better-to-do-than-move-my-arms-towards-a-purpose" way. And I had the best waves of my return so I suppose all this complaining about peer-pressure is in vain. Peer-pressure works. Gah.

And then, to equalize all the hard work, we went to L & L for some portuguese sausage and eggs and loco moco. Yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I will be so roly poly by the time his July 5th departure rolls around ...

Today was good and tomorrow should be "better" [ie. bigger] which means that I will probably wait until Sunday to try and surf again. All this swell-age is making it difficult for me to try to get back into the swing of things. But yay for everyone else [I guess, I'm selfish].

.in the news.

Also in the news today. Kelly Slater's movie, "Letting Go," is slated [see the pun?] to show today at the Maui Film Festival. The film depicts Slater's journey through his 2005 tour, up to his crowning 7th World Champion victory. That's seven victories is just thirteen years. Kelly [we are on a first name basis] should start sharing, and allow other people to win world titles. I think he's just being selfish [and selfish people suck].

But Kelly gives me hope. He is 33 and still winning world titles, which means, in theory, there is still hope for me!

Also, Chelsea Nagata [of I forget what swim club ... Maui Swim Club?] became UCI's first All-American female swimmer. She went a 53.18 which in case you don't know about swimming is AMAZING. The fact that she can swim butterfly alone is amazing because I hate butterfly and think it's a retardedly difficult stroke and given the chance, would strangle the person who invented it. But cheers to her.

The idiots of C&C [City & County] maintenance shattered a glass light all over the pool deck/gutter/pool so we shut down this afternoon and our first day of lessons was canceled! Sad, I miss teaching little kiddies and dunking their heads under h2o when they don't listen. Can't complain though, since we did get paid for 4.5 hours for not doing a whole lot [except I did get in the pool with my goggles and a glove to try to find glass on the bottom of the pool ... fun]. Yay. And since work ended early I agreed to go with Brian to D&B's happy hour and we sat on the roof so Brian could surf and I could watch the waves at Ala Moana. It's rediculous how even just watching surfing makes me. All tingly. And I actually smile [which if you know, is a big deal]. No, it wasn't the alcohol making me all happy-happy.

I tried surfing this morning but G. lied and it was big so I went out and then back in and ended up shopping instead. Such a girl.

The opihi convinced me to go nightsurfing tonight. Despite the winds, the absent full moon, the slopey waves, having to park in Waikiki, and images of sharks and flesh-eating-bacteria prancing through my pretty head it was a good time. I haven't had a surf buddy since my return two weeks ago and even if I did have friends, Opihi is still one of my favorites.


His poor fin was attacked. Apparently his dog doesn't enjoy being left alone and this is how she exhibits her displeasure. Our cat just poos in the shoe closet.

The waves were yuck so we didn't stay out long. After showering, we were about to start the trek back to my truck when fireworks started less than a few miles off-shore. It would have been amazing to have seen it from the water, but it was still pretty amazing, at such a random hour and on such a random day, to see a performance as lengthy [it went on for 5+ minutes] and spectacular as the one that was put on. And I didn't even have my camera ... but then again, neither did half the tourists who were crowding around the water's edge.


Opihi is trying to convince me to surf Waik's again tomorrow but I'm trying to hold out against it. The swell isn't so big that I'm afraid [or unable] to paddle out to Concessions. Also, I'm retarded and can't surf anywhere other than Concessions, even if it means I might not be able to surf at all [I really need to work on this "trying new things" and "expanding my horizons" nonsense]. G. said he'd call tomorrow to give me the real surf report and then I suppose I can make my "informed" decision.



I remember when I was someone else's surf report.

.opihi love.

An addendum to the previous post.
MY OPIHI HAS RETURNED HOME. I now have a surf buddy! My heart is all a flutter. It will be a fun few weeks ... =)

7 am. text message.

Opihi cell:
Should I longboard today?

All a flutter.

There was too much wind and not enough waves and I had to [try to] parallel park. All I do is complain.

.tandem.

I want to try to tandem.

Though I'm sure that as with most things in life, it is not nearly as simple as it appears in photographs. It doesn't even seem like the girl needs to do anything except wave her arms in attractive poses and smile and look pretty [none of which I am capable of doing]. It's kind of like pairs figure skating in surfing [where the men does a majority of the work tossing around the girl and the girl's main objective is too land without falling]. But as with all pairs events, one needs a partner and I am uncertain as to where and how one would go about finding a male companion who wants to toss them around in the water. I wish that I too, were as bendy and throwable as the 98 lb. girls they depict winning contests. Then at least maybe I could be a winner at some type of surfing venture.

I believe that my favorite pose/position would be the one on the second row [from the bottom] all the way on the far right [the one where she is doing the splits]. How do they find women who can contort their body is such awkward/graceful/kink positions? And how do they find men who can surf AND carry a woman in such a position? I wish I could do just one position on land ...

To learn more about tandem surfing and it's Waikiki beginnings [I suppose that it would make sense that tandem surfing was invented where surfing was invented] visit surfline.
Tandem surfing.

Blogging at 12:30 am. even though it's quite past my 10:00 pm/11:00 pm bedtime. Oh, the dedication.

Especially since I've been awake since 5:45 am.

And at the beach at 6:32 am. on the dot.

Someone [ie. the State] was silly and put cones on the dotted lines. Because drivers wouldn't normally stay on their side of the road?

Despite the cones, I HAD GOOD PARKING [rah, rah]. It was also a lot bigger today than yesterday which means that I spent more time sitting on the outside being mocked by Steve and G. then actually catching waves. On the first wave I paddled for G. told me that I was going to die so I pulled out[and he subsequently tried to catch it], and after that I didn't feel much like paddling for waves. I think graduation from college has made me lazier in the wave-paddling arena. I doubt that I'll even make an attempt to surf tomorrow though my alarm is set for 5:45 am. I have yet to sleep in past 8:00 am. since my return from California and I am looking forward to A NICE LONG REM CYCLE. Yum.

I cannot believe how many people there are in the h2o at 7:00 am [22+ just at Concessions]. It's rediculous and I hate my life. People need to stop listening to swell forecasts, surfing in the morning, and surfing at Concessions. I wish I could say that I have higher hopes for tomorrow but that would be a big fat lie. Stupid 3 day weekend. Stupid Sunday when they're going to close down the parking key in the morning. Stupid people that have jobs that allow them to go to work late[r] in the morning. Grouchy, grouchy, grouchy.

.how were the waves today?.

Ask me tomorrow.

.media lemurs.

This morning I headed to 7-11 to enjoy one of my favorite post-surfing foods [alongside with Chipotatle and Shaken Black Iced Tea Lemonade from Starbucks, neither which are available in Hawaii so I only presume they would make wonderful post-surfing foods].
Slurpee!

Much to my dismay I realized that they raised the prices! Gah!
I cried and then used my free-slurpee coupon. I wish I could go on strike against the price increase but I love slurpees just too much. They are frozen goodness.

Also, if you read the surf report and thought there was a swell today, THEY TRICKED YOU. Fortunately, they didn't trick me. I knew there would be no surf and went out anyway [I'm a genius like that]. But they did trick a bunch of people today. Silly lemurs of Honolulu Advertiser/Honolulu Star-Bulletin/local news channels/Surfnewsnetwork. I suppose that they are only following the advice/signs of the buoys. I should be my own buoy. No waves ever. Everyone stay home. But if you are a mindless follower of the media, you can read all about the swell that arrived today that didn't.
I can't go surfing tomorrow cause I have internship in downtown and have to WALK my lazy butt to work. Parking in downtown is much too expensive and if you would provide me with a stall [near or] in downtown you would be my god forever.

What an idiot. I'm not certain why a surfer as talented and recognized as Sunny Garcia would do something so obviously idiotic [not to mention unnecessary] as tax evasion. And then, I'm equally unsure why The Honolulu Advertiser would take 3/4 of the article discussing what a great person he was despite his crime.



The article:
Former surf king Garcia pleads guilty to tax evasion.

.fear and loathing concessions.

G. was silly today and tried to introduce Glenn[iffer] and myself. It went something like this.

G. Oh, sorry. Glenn[iffer] this is Crystal. Crystal, Glenn[iffer].
*dead silence ensues*

Yes, that is how much he hates me. All because of three summers ago. And knowing Glenn[iffer] [and Eddie] they will carry this loathing of me to their grave. Argh.

.oodgey finger disease.

In an attempt to finaggle my way out of dishwashing duty [Grandma got out with the excuse that her fingers were cracked] I told Mommy that my finger was infected and showed her my cut, which has in the past few days, become quite swollen. She [and Daddy] freaked out and now don't want to allow me to surf tomorrow. They're going to be VERY displeased when they figure out tomorrow morning that I have no intention on listening to them. Mommy suggested that if my finger doesn't heal in a few days that we go see a doctor, but guess what? I DON'T HAVE MEDICAL INSURANCE. In your face [not my mom's face of course, but the face of medicine]. RAWR.

My poor, poor, poor finger. It does look a tad swollen doesn't it? [Which freaks me out a little since I have an active imagination following the story of the guy whose body was swollen to 6/7 times its normal size after he fell into the Ala Wai Canal! Yikes!]

Ironically, as we were discussing my yucky finger I was perusing Free Surf Magazine and discovered this concoction invented by Surf Syndicate, actually a dietary supplement that was designed to kill bacterias typically found in oceans, lakes, rivers and sand. It can also be used as an oral spray prior to and following entering the h2o, and topically to prevent infection resulting from coral wounds and other minor cuts. Doesn't it sound like some bacterial miracle drug? I just want to spray it all over my body and roll around in the h2o.

And here are some fun facts that the article provides.

44 billion tons of mass solids [ie. sewage sludge] are deposited into the coastal waters of the Pacifical Ocean annually

20,000 days of beach closures were ordered during 2004 [85% due to the presence of bacteria associated with human waste from local sewage plants]

.and surfing too.

Apparently praying for small surf works! So it's only praying for big[ger] surf that fails. Good to know.

There was much "roaring" this morning when I woke up at 7 rather than 6 am. [which I set my alarm for]. There went my wonderful plans of going to sleep before 11 so that I could be in the h2o by 6:30, getting great parking, etc. Bah. My mommy knew I was grouchy [cause I was roaring] and cooked me bacon. I love bacon!

And surfing too.

.hoping for smaller surf.

The surf was surprisingly "good" today. "Good" being the general concensus by other surfers who actually caught waves.
I made it out to Ala Moana by 7:15 and it was already sunny and there was no good parking. I had to park all the way in the back of the key near the spot that Toe got her car broken into. I managed to paddle out through the channel between Concessions and Big Rights without getting tossed around too much. I caught TWO waves the entire time, the last one being a decent one despite the fact that I literally had throw myself off of it because there was a shortboarder in the way and I didn't trust myself not to kill him. Wah. I was sitting on the outside much of the time and was offered waves by the guys, but just smiled and shook my head. I like living. I must have been looking friendly today [which is an extreme rarity for me] because I smiled at another girl and she started talking to me [since we were the only girls out] about how it sucks to be the only one left on the outside during a big set because then all the guys shout at you to "go" when you really just want to make it over the wave without dying. Yup. I think tomorrow I need to wear a big sign that says "I DON'T HAVE MEDICAL INSURANCE." [Brian says that with my luck I'm going to catch malaria before the end of the week]. Yay for [hopefully] smaller surf tomorrow. 3-4 feet, which is what they promised today. I can't believe I'm praying for SMALLER surf. Shame on me.

.coming home.

Didn't get to make it out to the h2o today cause I had to take Grandma to the dentish [for which she was being silly and making up funny excuses about why she couldn't go]. I was thinking about going out in the afternoon but after a one hour nap that dragged on for three hours I was feeling much too lazy to have my arse worked another time around in the supposed 3-5+ feet surf that surfnewsnetwork was promising.

Because I didn't surf [or partake in any physical activity] I headed over to Manoa pool to swim some laps and saw all of my beloved coworkers, my swim coach, and various regulars. I realized, there's coming home, and then there's coming home. I come home to my family, to my house, my room [from which I am displaced and now have to move upstairs], to my dog, ono local food, drinkable tap water, humidity. But too, there is something about coming home, and returning to a place where everyone knows you by face, where they watch out for you and take care of you.
So in response to Neal's constant taunting about why I surf Concessions: I surf Concessions because coming back to Concessions is like coming home. Where on any given day I see people I know, where I don't feel bad about lying to my parents that I'm surfing with [fill in the blank] because there will more than likely be someone out there [like Uncle Po] who will watch out for me and make sure that I'm paddling out on [and not for] the big waves. On land Uncle Po stands 5'2. In the water he around 7'0. And you'd probably have to sit out there, day in and day out to understand the reason why. Why Uncle Po can not surf for a month, and on his first day back, shake hands with all his friends, laugh about sharing the ocean, and still warn another guy that he's getting in the way. There is a stiff upper hand that rules the break, but if that's where you love to surf, that's home, regardless of the people [which for the most part I do adore] and the faults of the break. Home is home.

I got a call from G. tonight while I was out with my parents [yes, that is how lame and sorely lacking for entertainment and friend's] and he said he was surfing at Concessions tomorrow. My first 7 am. session of the summer and then guarding all day. I need a job [with medical insurance]. Someone hire me!

.day number 1.5.

Alas. Back in my teeny tiny, 30 mile by 30 mile landmass.
After just a one hour catnap on our last night in Vegas I crashed on the plane ride home, but did manage to drag myself out for a 2-ish hour of surfing [and even paddled over to Kewalos to surf with Mari and her dad which we all know, should earn me a big fat pat on the back as I am loathe to surf spots other than Concessions]. I saw Matt's dad as I was heading out. Said he forgot his contacts but said the waves were pretty good. Pretty good = scary after 5+ months of not surfing [and not having worked out]. Yikes bikes. It seems that no matter when I return home, the first day back there is always a south swell and an oogle billion number of people out in the water. So I got my sorry butt worked. On day number .5 [yesterday] I only caught a few waves, mainly because I was afraid of eating shit. But the less I thought about it [and how afraid I was of dying] the easier it was. Today [in keeping with tradition] I went over the falls, was held under water for very long periods of time, and nearly killed by a longboard [The guy was sitting on the outside and took off on a 4 foot wave and I couldn't make it around him and he couldn't make it around me, the last thing I saw was him falling off the wave about a few feet away from me. When I finally made it up for air he asked me if I was okay and I could say was "I'm" and then choked on the water in my lungs. He looked worried until I managed, moments later, to say "I'm sorry," to which he responded, "that wave was out of control." Yay]. And since I don't have a single penny of medical insurance following my graduation from college, dying or suffering bodily injury would have been a bad idea.
Warren saw me yesterday and said "hello." Surprising that they recognize me after I chopped off all my hair. Today I saw Uncle Po and Stan. Stan said he thought I was a Japanese tourist. [short hair and tanned = Japanese tourist] I also saw my "favorite" longboarder, Glen[iffer].
I thought I didn't miss it as much I really did. This will be one of the things [if any] that keep me from zipping up my still un-packed luggage and purchasing a one-way return ticket. Mari said she's giving it till December. We'll see.